Hag Purim Sameach!
by BatYisrael
Summary: It's Purim, a Jewish holiday, explanation inside, and Ziva decides to throw a party. Slight Tiva at the end. Oneshot.


Hag Purim Sameach

Hag Purim Sameach!

Tony slipped through the elevator door at a run, hoping to make it to his desk before- "DiNozzo, you're late!" Gibbs yelled, putting his coffee down and standing up from his desk. He gave Tony a look that very plainly said _I'm waiting_.

"Uh, boss, I-there was traffic! And I-um, won't let it happen again boss." He received a slap upside the head on his way to his desk. "Thank you boss."

Tony paused when he reached his desk. There was a small purple box on it with ribbons covering the opening. He quickly removed the ribbons to peer inside. There was a folded note, some chocolate, a little bottle of vodka, and some triangle-shaped cookies with what looked like jelly in the middle. He took a bite and couldn't help letting out a soft "Mmmmmm…" They were good.

Ziva had her head down on her desk. "Sad that you didn't get one, David?" he asked, holding out the box impishly. She just grunted out something that sounded suspiciously like a Hebrew curse. He unfolded the note and then realized why she hadn't gotten one. _Hag Purim Sameach!_, it said. _Happy Purim! You are invited to a Purim celebration tonight at 7:00, my house. – Ziva-_

Tony struggled to recall what little he knew about Purim. It was a Jewish holiday. A happy one, too. Lots of costumes, even the adults. Something about a bad guy in a triangle hat, a stupid king, a beautiful girl, and her cousin. He vowed to learn more before 7:00. Maybe he would look it up. Or maybe he would just take the easy way out and ask Ducky.

But until then, it was time for his favorite activity of the day. "A little tired there, Ziva?" he asked, poking her in the most annoying, persistent way he could manage. He moved his hand just in time as she landed a punch that would have broken every bone in his fingers if he hadn't moved. "Late night last night?" he asked. She only gave him a death glare in answer. "Hm, perhaps an early morning?"

"Purim started last night, Tony," she informed him in her most snippy tone of voice. "I had to stay at temple for the whole megillah reading. Plus it's a commandment on Purim until you can't tell the difference between _Haman v'Mordechai_, Haman and Mordechai, the bad guy and the good guy of the Purim story." When Tony raised an eyebrow at her, she hurriedly added "Of course I didn't actually drink _that_ much. So are you coming tonight?"

Tony smiled wolfishly at her. "Will you be in costume?" he asked suggestively.

She smiled mysteriously at him, then said simply, "But of course."

x-x-x

The doorbell rang at 6:30. That would be McGee coming early, probably bringing something to go with dinner. Ziva opened the door to see Tony standing there in a tux. She gaped at him as he returned the favor. Then, recovering herself, she began teasing him. "A tuxedo. Very _Jamesh Bawnd_," she said, trying to imitate the accent that he always used.

He smiled. "And what are you?" he asked looking at her tiara, to the long, regal, midnight blue dress, to the dark silver heels. "That is most definitely not the career girl Barbie costume."

"Well, I'm Esther, of course!" she said, jokingly pushing him.

"So explain the story to me," he said, sitting on the edge of a wooden chair by her dining table. Ziva looked for a hint of a joke in his eyes, and was surprised to find that Tony was actually interested in learning.

She pulled a chair around to face his and began. "A long time ago in Persia, there was a foolish king name Ahaseurus. He decided to throw a huge banquet and party for all of his friends, lords, and advisors. His wife, the beautiful and proud Queen Vashti threw a banquet at the same time for all of her friends, and the wives of the lords and advisors. At one point, Ahaseurus was bragging about how beautiful his wife was. He sent a few of his messengers to tell Vashti to come before the king and his party, and some say he told her to come naked. Well, of course, she refused, and the king became very angry. She was banished from the kingdom for disobeying her king, and stripped of her position as queen.

Esther was a normal Jewish girl. When she was young, her parents died, and she went to live with her cousin Mordechai. When the king banished Vashti, he sent all his messengers to look for a new, more beautiful queen. When the messengers saw Esther, they immediately took her with them to see the king. When he saw her, he forgot all other women and married her.

Haman was the king's advisor. He was a wicked, self-serving man. He proclaimed that everyone had to bow down to him because he was the king's advisor. Everyone just went along with it to avoid consequence, but Mordechai would not bow. He said that he would bow only to God. Of course, Haman was not too keen on this idea, and was furious.

One day, Mordechai heard two servants of the king talking. They were discussing a plan to poison the king's food that night. Mordechai rushed to tell the grateful Ahaseurus. He made both of the servants eat the food. They both died, and Mordechai's name went down in the king's record book.

Looking in his record book some time later, the king came across Mordechai's name. He realized that he had never rewarded the man who had saved his life. He turned to his trusted advisor and asked Haman what he would do for a man who had provided a great service to the king. Thinking that the king meant him, Haman said that he would throw a great parade with the man at the lead, on the king's finest horse, wearing the king's finest robes, led by a trusted advisor of the king. The king told Haman that that was a fantastic idea, and Haman himself could lead Mordechai's horse. This only strengthened Haman's hatred of the Jews.

Eventually, Haman told the king that there were people, dangerous people, plotting against the king. He told the king that the Jews would endanger their way of life. Not knowing the religion of his wife, Ahaseurus allowed Haman to do with the Jews what he saw fit. Haman and his wife built gallows and drew _purim_, lots, to decide on a day to kill the Jews.

Mordechai told Esther to go to the king. However, if she went without being summoned, Esther could be put to death unless the king lowered his scepter to her. She prayed and fasted, then got dressed up in her best dress and makeup, and went to see the king. When she entered, Ahaseurus was so struck by Esther's beauty that he lowered his scepter to her, saying he would give her the world if she asked. She asked only that Haman and Ahaseurus join her for dinner the next night. At the dinner, Esther exposed Haman for the horrible man that he was, telling the king that he conspired to kill all her people.

Enraged, Ahaseurus had Haman hung on his own gallows. Mordechai became the king's new advisor. And they all lived happily ever after," Ziva finished with a laugh.

Tony sat back. "Quite a story. Attempted assassination, plots of genocide, maniacal politicians, lazy rulers. That would make the best James Bond movie ever." Ziva rolled her eyes just as the doorbell rang, the other guests arriving. Tony put his hand on her arm. "Thank you very much for inviting me, and for telling me the story," he said.

Ziva simply smiled at him and got up to answer the door, silk dress rustling. "Well," she began, contemplating. "Every Esther needs her foolish king."


End file.
